Dear Reader

I love my 70s. When I was in my 20s and 30s I honestly didn't think I'd live past 40. The closer I got to 40 the more excited I became. And when I turned 40 and realised I was well, I was vibrantly alive, life became exquisite. Every birthday from 40 became a precious gift and I came to mark 'the beginning of my life' from my 40th birthday. The mirror reminds me that's not exactly true! But - I love to play 'what if' - What if I was only 38 in about three weeks?

So with my 78th birthday around the corner, I've started looking back not on only this past year, but on a long life that has been the most wonderful teacher. I started to list the lessons learned along the way and stopped at 78. Honestly, there are many many more. But 78 seemed an appropriate number to share.

I put these 78 lessons into little paragraphs and am posting them as a countdown to my birthday on my Author Facebook page, my personal FaceBook page, and on my Substack page.

I'm sharing them here with you, in their entirety, so you can enjoy the fun too. (Spoiler alert: you are getting all the posts before the social media viewings finish!) Over the next few months, I'll pick out a few and write a few paragraphs about "WHY" each one made the list.

Here's the

78 years of Lessons Learned

💌Counting Down to Birthday #78: 78 Life Lessons in 19 Days

In 19 days from when I post this newsletter, I’ll turn 78 years old. That’s 936 months, over 28,000 days, and more cups of tea than I could possibly count.

Along the way, I’ve gathered a small mountain of lessons - some learned the easy way, most learned the hard way. They’ve come from raising a family, making mistakes, rebuilding, travelling, working, loving, losing, crying and laughing through it all.

To celebrate this birthday, I’m sharing 78 bite-sized lessons in little “tidbits” you can read in under a minute. One morsel a day, until the candles are lit. Or you can read them here, all at once.

Lesson # 1 – Resilience Basics

Life has taught me that resilience isn’t something you’re born with - it’s something you grow, day by day, through the choices you make.

1. Resilience is not a personality trait - it’s a muscle. Use it often.

2. You can survive what you thought would break you.

3. Fear often shrinks when you walk toward it.

4. A small act of courage today makes tomorrow easier.

5. Saying “I’ll try” beats “I can’t” almost every time.

No matter how hard the wind blows, you’re stronger than you think. The proof? You’re still here.

Lesson #2 –Getting Up Again

Some of my strongest moments came right after my hardest falls. The secret isn’t avoiding the fall, it’s learning how to rise again.

6. When life knocks you down, get up, slower if you must, but get up.

7. Trust that even broken threads can be woven into something beautiful.

8. Some days, courage looks like taking a shower and making a cup of tea.

9. Gratitude can be a lifeline, not just a virtue.

10. It’s possible to start over at any age.

Falling is part of the story. The rising - that’s where you find your character.

Lesson #3 – Love & Boundaries

Loving people well sometimes means giving them freedom, and other times it means standing firm. The art is knowing which is which.

11. Love your children fiercely, but let them walk their own path.

12. Being right is less important than staying connected.

13. The quiet “I’m here for you” matters more than clever advice.

14. Grandparenting and great-grandparenting (and even great-great grandparenting) are privileges, even when tricky.

Love is richer when it’s given freely, not out of guilt or fear.

Lesson #4 – Healthy Relationships

Strong relationships aren’t about perfect harmony - they’re about tending the connection, even when the music gets messy.

15. You can love someone deeply and still set boundaries.

16. Not all family relationships will be what you hoped. That’s okay.

17. Listening without fixing is an underrated superpower.

18. Forgiveness frees you, whether or not they change.

19. Relationships take tending, like a garden.

Good people make life lighter. Hold them close. Let the rest drift away.

Lesson #5 – Wellbeing Wisdom

Looking after my health hasn’t just kept me going, it’s given me the energy to enjoy the life I’m living.

20. Sometimes the most loving thing you can say is “no.”

21. Your body will surprise you, sometimes with limitations, sometimes with strength.

22. Movement is medicine.

23. So is strength training. It’s never too late to get stronger.

Caring for yourself isn’t selfish. It’s how you make sure you can keep showing up.

Lesson #6 – Living in Your Body

My body has been my lifelong home - not always perfect, but worth caring for with patience and kindness.

24. Rest is productive.

25. Laughing is exercise for your spirit.

26. You can’t out-exercise a bad attitude.

27. Fresh air and sunshine help almost everything.

Treat your body like a beloved old house: keep it tended, respect its quirks, and it will shelter you well.

Lesson #7 – Health Habits

Small, steady habits are the threads that weave a healthy life. The trick is to notice them and keep them going.

28. Listen to your body. It whispers before it shouts.

29. Health is built from hundreds of small choices, not one big change.

30. Water is your friend.

31. You’re never too old to be a beginner.

Small steps add up over decades. Your future self will thank you.

Lesson #8 – Creativity Sparks

Creativity isn’t a luxury; it’s one of the ways I’ve healed, grown, and stayed curious about life.

32. Creativity is a form of self-care.

33. Writing teaches you what you think.

34. Reading is time travel without the jet lag.

35. Your stories matter, even if you think they’re ordinary. Someone needs to hear them (even if it's you!)

Creativity isn’t just for artists. It’s for anyone who wants to feel more alive.

Lesson #9 – Learning & Growth

The world never runs out of things to learn. Staying curious keeps life fresh and full of possibility.

36. Curiosity is ageless.

37. Start before you feel ready.

38. Perfectionism is just fear in fancy clothes.

39. Every skill starts with awkward first attempts.

Stay curious. It’s the closest thing we have to a fountain of youth.

Lesson #10 – Purpose & Work

Purpose has been less about “finding my calling” and more about choosing to make my days count.

40. Making things is good for your soul.

41. Purpose isn’t found, it’s created.

42. Work that helps others is never wasted.

43. Sometimes “good enough” is actually perfect.

Your work matters, not because it’s perfect, but because it’s yours.

Lesson #11 – Work & Worth

I’ve learned to measure my life less by the tasks I tick off and more by the people and moments that matter.

44. You can leave a job and still keep the lessons.

45. Helping others often helps you even more.

46. Your worth is not measured in productivity.

47. You get to define success for yourself.

You’re worth more than your productivity. Always.

Lesson #12 – Aging Well

Aging isn’t something I fight; it’s something I shape, one choice at a time.

48. If you can’t see the purpose in your day, create one.

49. Some seasons are for doing; others are for being.

50. Kindness counts as a legacy.

51. Age is a privilege denied to many.

Live in a way your younger self would admire.

Lesson #13 – Joy in Aging

There’s a lightness that comes with age - the freedom to be yourself without apology.

52. Wrinkles are just life’s laughter lines.

53. Keep learning new things - it keeps your brain spry.

54. Style has no age limit.

55. You don’t have to pretend you’re younger - you can be fabulous now.

The older you get, the more you realize - joy was never in the things. It was in the moments.

Lesson #14 – Living Fully

I try to make plans that give me something to look forward to, no matter my age or stage.

56. Share your stories. They’re the bridge to younger generations.

57. Adaptation is the secret to aging well.

58. Don’t stop making plans.

59. The best anti-aging treatment is joy.

Life isn’t a dress rehearsal. Wear the bright scarf. Order dessert. Say yes.

Lesson #15 – Everyday Joy

It’s the little things - the tea, the laughter, the small adventures - that make a life big.

60. Every decade has its own kind of beauty.

61. A cup of tea can solve more than you think.

62. Travel - even just to the next town.

63. Treasure the small pleasures.

Joy hides in plain sight. Practice spotting it.

Lesson #16 – Perspective

With time, I’ve learned that what feels urgent today may be invisible tomorrow.

64. Be generous with compliments.

65. Keep a sense of humor handy.

66. Music can lift you when nothing else will.

Time gives you the gift of seeing what matters, and what was just noise.

Lesson #17 – Peace of Mind

Peace comes when I choose what to hold onto - and what to let go.

67. Children make life richer.

68. Speak kindly - especially to yourself.

69. Nature is the best therapist.

70. Celebrate small wins.

71. This too shall pass - and so will that.

Let go of the need to be right. Trade it for the freedom to be at peace.

Lesson #18 – Hard-Won Wisdom

Some truths only reveal themselves after many seasons of life.

72. The people you admire have struggles you can’t see.

73. Most problems look smaller in the morning.

74. You can’t control everything - but you can choose your response.

75. Don’t believe every thought you think.

76. You’ll never regret being kind.

77. Some answers only come with time.

78. A good story, a good hug, and a good laugh - can heal more than you expect.

You can’t rush wisdom. But you can keep your heart open until it arrives.

Day 19 – (Early) Birthday Post 🎂

🎂 At 78 Years Old: What I Know for Sure

Some people see birthdays as a marker of what’s been lost. I see them as proof of what’s been gained: perspective, laughter lines, patience, and the deep knowing that joy and sorrow can exist in the same day, and that’s perfectly okay.

I also see them as a marker of how deep is forgiveness of my self for all those choices I made that turned out wrong, for the hurts I caused others, for the things I didn't see when my focus was out of alignment.

I’ve learned that life isn’t about avoiding the storms - it’s about knowing where to find the shelter, and who to share it with.

It’s about keeping curiosity alive, loving with an open hand, and remembering that kindness costs nothing and changes everything.

To those who’ve walked beside me in any chapter of these 78 years: thank you.

To those who are just joining my story: welcome.

Here’s to the next chapter - and to finding joy in it, every single day. 💛

And look out for expansions on some of the experiences that lead to these 78 lessons in future Newsletters.

Thank you!

With love
Stephanie

Why I Write - for you and for me too.

Some stories come from lived experience, like navigating my son’s addiction and the long road of recovery. Others are shaped by imagination, like the cozy mystery I’m writing, set in a small café where trust is both tested and rebuilt. Some of my life stories still bring tears. Others make me smile. And many are filled with memories that warm my heart.

I write for anyone who’s ever carried a burden across generations, and for anyone who longs to heal forward.

My thoughts for Living Life in 2025 and beyond:

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"My religion is kindness"

Dalai Lama

“Cast your bread upon the waters and it will
come back - buttered”

Doris May Payne - my mother

"Life is a Daring Adventure or Nothing"

Helen Keller

“Write it on my heart that every day is
the best day of the year”

Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Remember that sometimes not getting
what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck"
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Dalai Lama

“I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave [person] is not [the one] who does not feel afraid, but [the one] who conquers that fear.”

Nelson Mandela

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www.StephanieHammondAuthor.com

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